The Importance Of Being Brett

 Brett Fav-ra coverage made this blog into what it is today — a relatively anonymous, derivative, and Arizona-centric wasteland for the English language.  Because of this, it is incumbent upon someone at SoD to provide commentary on No. 4’s recent surgery and impending epic failure career with the Vikings.  Thus, a dramatization of the inevitable Peter King-Brett Favre texting conversation which followed his recent surgery seemed in order.

When God tore an ACL back in '94, he went to this guy to get it fixed.

PK:  OMG.  How did the surgery go?

BF:  Great!  BTW, Dr. James Andrews is so dreamy.

PK:  He’s no George Wendt.

BF:  Point taken.

PK:  You know, your right shoulder surgery will be the most publicly followed surgery since Barbaro (RIP).

BF: LOL

PK: Do you like Me or Mort better?

BF:  Totally you.  Mort is weird.

PK:  Can I drive your tractor next time I come to Mississippi?

BF:  Sure.

PK:  Did Mort get to drive your tractor?

BF:  Nope.  He just wanted to play pickup football in jeans with some of my friends. 

PK:  Aww, crap.  I wanna do that too.

Read Full Post »

Tim Hasselback is as Good at his Analyst Job as He Was At Football

A Poor Man's Jared Lorenzen

I promised myself I wouldn’t use this blog to blatantly attack people when they don’t agree with my obvious biases – wait! It’s the exact opposite! So guess what? Tim Hasselback – you’re a sucky loser.

If you missed it – and you probably did – Mr. Elizabeth Hasselback is apparently now an analyst for NFL Live on ESPN. This followed his stellar NFL career which spanned 4 different seasons (between 2002-2007) and 15 whole games. He actually even got to start a few for the Redskins in 2003. In addition he had a very brief stint as a Cardinals QB in 2007 – signing after Matt Leinart, Kurt Warner, Neil Lomax, Timm Rosenbach, and Tom Tupa (list may not be accurate) all went down.

Ordinarily I would just let his general existence as an NFL analyst roll off my back. He’s no Jesse Palmer in the looks department, in fact he’s so bland that you barely care he’s alive – but he’s drawn my ire with some recent comments. While discussing the recently released ESPN NFL Power Rankings on NFL Live, Hasselback cited the Cardinals as the team most likely to decline in 2009. His reasons?

Read Full Post »

Don Banks Believes in the Cardinals*

Don Banks Only Begrudingly Accepts the Cardinals Existence

Sports Illustrated’s Don Banks produced a predictions column claiming that 6 new teams will in the NFL Playoffs in 2009 and 6 old ones will be out. According to Banks, among those entering the playoff fray will be New England, Buffalo, New Orleans, Dallas, Houston, and San Francisco. Apparently San Fran will be entering the playoffs at the expense of….you guessed it…the Arizona Cardinals.

Banks’ reasoning for the 49ers cracking the playoff party is as follows:

The 49ers finished the season at 5-2 in their last seven games under interim head coach Mike Singletary, and that’s almost always going to earn you chic-pick, team-on-the-rise status heading into the following season. But there is something about Singletary’s old-school approach that seems to be exactly what the lackadaisical 49ers have lacked in recent years.

Read Full Post »