Dolphins Rename Stadium, Promise Dennis Quaid Will be Ready for Next Season

I can't be any worse than Chad Pennington or Chad Henne.

The Miami Dolphins recently renamed the stadium they share with the Florida Marlins and Miami Hurricanes; it’s now called Landshark Stadium.  While the Dolphins claim the renaming is part of a partnership with singer and beach hippie Jimmy Buffet, I doubt this.  I believe the Dolphins are attempting to create excitement in their flagging organization by slowly morphing into the Miami Sharks from the immortal film, Any Given Sunday.  Tell me you wouldn’t rather see Al Pacino roaming the sidelines on Sunday afternoons than Tony Sparano?  And what looks better: the Sharks all black uniforms or the Dolphins aqua monstrosities?  I thought so.

Advertisements

Read Full Post »

Dear Byrnesey, get out

Dear Eric Byrnes,

We have been seriously looking back upon our connection and getting very clear on what we need and desire out of a relationship, and we don’t need an overpaid 33 year old loafer in the outfield.  The conclusion we have come to is that we are too different in both our personality and our desired lifestyles to be able to successfully live together with joy, bliss, good communication, and interaction.

Dont go away mad, just go away ... now.

This is not about you or about me “winning or losing”(actually it is), or about one of us being wrong — this is not about your anemic .115 batting average or your pathetic .226 on base percentage all for the bargain price of $11,666,666 for the 2009 season — it is about two ways of being… which do not fulfill each other, or go together. Though we had been open to hoping that you could possibly live up the mediocrity that caused us to give you that ridiculous extension, it is now very clear that we are not ‘right’ for each other at this time in our lives.

Read Full Post »