(Editor’s Note: Derived from an exclamation made by a young lady who felt shunned by a gentleman at a party, this weekly column aims to remind you of some of the things you may have missed.)
Rocket Sauce . . . In his recent soft toss session spin control interview with Mike and Mike (one’s an athlete, one’s a dork…and there BOTH named “Mike” — let the hi jinx ensue!), Roger Clemens busted out a new strategy for denying the allegations that he took steroids — he has a family history of heart problems. This new ammunition presumably comes from Clemens’ new PR firm and Roger wasted no time in going to that well early and often. He proceeded to act as if this were the smoking gun, the revelation which would make us all stand up and cheer “INNOCENT!” What’s Rocket’s family history like, you say? Well his brother and his step dad have both had heart problems. Step dad? Take it easy Rocket. Why don’t you sit this next one out, stop talking for a while.
Leon Don’t Do Practice . . . Leon Washington is reportedly unhappy with his contract and has decided to skip spring workouts. Come on, he’s Leon. Is anyone really that surprised?
Was “Soul Glo Bandit” Already Taken? Arizona’s most notorious bank robber was apprehended this week. Authorities had nicknamed him the “Bad Hair Day Bandit” due to the ridiculously poor wigs he used as disguises. (Watch the video – one of his disguises is a DEAD ringer for Eriq La Salle in Coming to America) This has to be one of the worst criminal nicknames ever created. Right up there with some of the greats like “The Wet Bandits,” “The Lopper (or Son of Dad)” or “the Ex-Presidents.”