(Editor’s Note: Derived from an exclamation made by a young lady who felt shunned by a gentleman at a party, this weekly column aims to remind you of some of the things you may have missed.)
I’m not sure how official all these rankings really are. . . According to ABC 15, Valley dreamboat weatherman Bill Bellis has been named “most accurate forecaster” for the second straight year. Take that KPNX. Frankly, I am a little skeptical. There hasn’t been rankings this suspicious since Morty Seinfeld squared off against Lloyd Brides for the title of “Best Dad.” How hard is it Bill? 95% of the year it is sunny and hot. Even Brick Tamlin could get the weather right in Phoenix. Wow, that really escalated fast, didn’t it?
Take 10 shots and call me in morning… Jay Cutler likes to drink…a lot. According to the Chicago Tribune, “downfield might not be the only place new Bears quarterback Jay Cutler likes to take his shots.” (My tagline was better.) Even an idiot knows that this doesn’t exactly sit well with the whole “Type 1 Diabetes” thing. I thought Vandy was a place of scholastic acheivement. Isn’t that why they were the doormat of the SEC for all those years?
Territorial Pissings . . . Let me get this straight, Glendale wanted to build an arena for a mismanged team in an irrelevant sport and then let that team default on their lease and parking surcharges in the midst of massive citywide debt? (And not tell anyone about the default until after the story leaked.) But, now Glendale is refusing to allow a massive casino hotel project which would bring paying customers to its city (rather than staying in Scottsdale and commuting to the games in Glendale) and employ Arizona’s workforce? I honestly don’t know what to say to that logic. I guess that’s why they will always be the second “dale.”
And there were flames, and I heard a voice say “Zuul!” Since this is a column of weekly reminders, always remember to pay your respects to Gozer the Gozerian; lest you end up accidentally opening an interdimensional portal and unleashing a Mesopotamian god on your city.