Don’t Cry For Me Pennsylvania

First the Phillies.  Then the Steelers.  Now the Penguins.  The Keystone State holds three of the major four sports titles.  You probably already now this by now.  But, what about some of William Penn’s other championship sons and daughters?  Shouldn’t we extend congrats to these proud champions too? Splash Lagoon – Largest Indoor Waterpark on [...]

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Team Named After Flightless Bird Wins Sporting Championship

According to hazy reports from ESPN.com a team called the Pittsburgh Penguins defeated a team called the Detroit Red Wings in a sport referred to as “hokey” (sic?). This is certainly the first I’ve heard of this Stanley Cup Championship but I’m sure it’s a rather large accomplishment. It seems that the Penguins championship is [...]

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Hockey Fans, These Aren’t The Wings You’re Looking For

In case you missed it (and if the attached picture is any indicator, you did) there was a “Save the Coyotes” rally at the Native New Yorker in Glendale on Saturday.  According to reports, there were between 250 and 500 people attending the rally.  In other words, the usual crowd for a Tuesday night game [...]

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Quick Hitters

Former Cardinal Travis LaBoy could miss the entire 2009 season – Now the Cards releasing LaBoy looks even smarter than it did last week. I haven’t had the story confirmed yet but I’d imagine that LaBoy’s bones are made up of a combination of paper mache, spit, and chewing tobacco. Westgate City Center says no [...]

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Ovechkin Guarantees Game 6 Victory for Capitals…(In Hockey I guess)

In the wake of their Game 5 loss in Pittsburgh, Capitals star and super-spy Alexander Ovechkin has apparently guaranteed that the Caps will defeat the Penguins in Game 6 of the 2nd round (?) of the Eastern Conference (? research be damned) playoff series. I may not watch a whole lot of hockey but I’m [...]

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I Got Dibs On The Failing Hockey Team!

In case you haven’t noticed, things are going great over in Glendale with the Phoenix NHL [insert your name here] Coyotes.  (Seriously, what do I have to do to get you into an NHL franchise today?  This shit is priced to move.)  Many of these trials and tribulations have already been summarized on this fine [...]

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Baby, baby, baby, please?!?

Friends, Phoenicians, Reader: I come here not to praise the Phoenix Coyotes, the lepers of the Arizona sports world, but to offer them some honest help. In case you haven’t noticed, the Coyotes are in bad shape- But hey, who hasn’t forgotten to pay their lease for months at a time?  Or, additionally, to pay [...]

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Pretty Sneaky Ovechkin

Apparently Washington Capitals winger Alex Ovechkin was removed from a recent New York Rangers practice during the midst of the Caps-Rangers 1st round playoff series. Sources say the Rangers asked Ovechkin to leave after they saw through his clever disguise:

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